Hold Fast
I go out sailing once or twice a month now. My skills have drastically improved over the course of nearly two years since picking up this hobby. I still have some moments out on the water where things can become hectic by the intense wind that rushes in from the Pacific during the summer afternoons. Gusts of up to 30 knots and sustained winds of 15-25 knots (17-30mph) are normal in the summer. Small Craft Advisories are issued daily by the National Weather Service in the summer. This is why the Bay Area is a great place to sail, if you know what you’re doing.
There was a time when I feared the afternoon winds.
The gusts seemingly coming out of nowhere, would tip the boat over to an extreme heeled angle and then turn the boat to face directly into the wind, causing me to lose control. The sails would flap around deafeningly when this happened, adding to the chaos. I would fearfully turn the boat until I found a calm angle, letting out the main sail to reduce the heel of the boat. Even then, the wind had total control over me and my decisions. I could only react. And react hastily.
When this happened I would look out to the other ships sailing about on the water. They seemed to be having a great time. Why was it only me that couldn’t handle the heavy winds? I would try a little more to keep going, but the steep short waves crashing into me and the loss of steering seemed to be too much and I’d drop sail and motor back to the marina licking my wounds.
Then I learned about reefing. Which is reducing the amount of sail exposed to the wind. Basically not pulling the main sail all the way up, including the head sail. Doing this before the summer afternoon winds come has been a game changer for me. The boat maintains steering, the ride is much more comfortable, and I can be proactive.
Now I can sail anywhere in the bay, at any time, mindful of currents and tides of course, and not worry about the wind kicking my ass. The key is reefing before things get out of control. Trying to pull the sail down in heavy winds and choppy sea state is dangerous and not easy.
I’ve fallen in love with sailing now. I’d always enjoyed the sea. Especially after having served in the Navy aboard ships. My first time to Canada, Hawaii, Asia, and the Middle East, was by boat. Though the 300 foot long ships I served and lived aboard with 400 sailors are starkly different than the tiny thirty-ish foot boats I take out on the Bay to sail.
Still, the ocean has always called me. The vastness of it. The mystery of what might lay beneath the surface. The constant churning and ancient motion of the sea. I remember being a boy and standing at the beach in San Francisco and looking out westwards, wondering what lay beyond that thin line at the edge of the world. I remember being in the Navy, in the middle of the Indian Ocean, and looking all around seeing nothing. Nothing but horizon. Nothing but that liquid desert. I’d never felt so alone and small as I have in the middle of one of our oceans. I’ve never seen such beauty and plays on light as I have while traveling by sea.
So the ocean is where my heart lies. It’s no surprise sailing fits easily into place.
Harnessing the wind to pull and push you around wherever I could want is like discovering magic. I watch sailing videos, read sailing articles, read classics like The Long Way and Lin and Larry Pardey’s biographies, but probably more worrisome, I day dream about sailing. I simply can’t get enough of sailing.
There’s nothing like being on the water and feeling the wind pull you forward, like hands reaching out of thin air and grabbing you by the collar. Nothing like the sound of the waves as you cut through the water heeled over. I feel connected to those who have gone before me using the wind to move about. I have become a part of that ancient tradition of capturing wind. It’s a natural feeling, primordial almost. Like eating or sex or building with my hands. It just feels right. A missing puzzle piece to my life that I’ve stumbled upon.
How does sailing fit into my overall goal of wanting to retire early? Sailing and owning a boat are not cheap things. Currently, I sail through a sailing club, where I pay $300 a month to have unlimited access to a wide range of vessels to take out.
My plan was to quit the sailing club in 2024, so I could direct more money into my investments in preparation for 2025. But now I’m torn. I love sailing so much I can’t imagine not being able to sail anymore, but I also have this giant goal and dream to retire early I’m trying to steer towards.
Is it possible to successfully have two opposing things in life? Two things traveling in opposite directions? Why is it that the heart and mind never seem to settle on a single thing? Is it unreasonable to want what doesn’t fit into my master plan? Am I setting myself up for frustration?
2024 is supposed to be my “most frugal year ever”–at least this is how I thought about it. My plan is to take an ultra aggressive approach to saving money next year. Especially so, since this year I haven’t been able to save like years past.
In April of this year I reduced down my consistent 50% savings rate to 25% (my 401k is still maxed out). My $10K tax bill was the initial reason for my savings reduction. I’m also going to Europe in September. I’m turning 40 this year and have always wanted to turn 40 in another country. I turned 20 floating around in the middle of the Pacific. I turned 29 in Bangkok (okay not 30 but close enough). And since it seems like this is my tradition, I’m going to keep it up trying to be somewhere else every decade milestone of my life.
The thing is Europe is not cheap. I’ve been able to use credit card points to cover the flight over, but everything else has been adding up significantly. Instead of just hanging out in one country the entire time, like we did in 2021, this time we’ll be going to Germany, Ireland, and the UK. Catching Oktoberfest in Munich, and a West Ham United match in London, among other things. This will likely be our most expensive international travel trip ever.
I can afford it. It’s not like I’m borrowing money to pay for this trip. Traveling internationally once a year is a highlight and tradition for family. My oldest daughter is especially excited to see Germany, a place she’s interested in due to all the world war 2 movies I’ve conveniently had her watch her entire life.
Hence my low savings rate for the last 5 months. Yesterday I finally logged back onto Vanguard and upped the savings rate back to my original amount. My fingers are crossed that I can keep it at this rate through the year. Though I know that I have property taxes and home insurance coming up in November, then Christmas…then taxes.
In all, 2023 has felt like a savings failure. Which is why I’ve been adamant in my head that I’ll make up for it in 2024. And why sailing is on the chopping block. And my YouTubeTV subscription. And possibly no international travel next year. Pretty much all of my current luxuries will be getting a once over to see if we can do without in the name of retiring early and setting off for distant horizons. Why? Because I still believe in delayed gratification.
You might think with my reduced savings rate and being a member of a sailing club, that I’ve thrown in with the current fads in the personal finance community. But that’s not the case.
Wack Fads in FI?
I’m not sure why the wack trend in the FIRE community these days is to demonize frugality and saving discipline. A rush of books and figure heads have come out that have pushed this alternative FI thread that sacrificing and delayed gratification is somehow suddenly a bad thing.
Why the big change? The only reason why I can see this current FI fad is now a thing, is because those who are pushing it have already reaped the rewards of saving hardcore and enjoyed the bull market of the past decade. Plus, everyone is doing it, and talking about the same old points of traditional FIRE strategy gets boring real quick, so why not join in?
I’m not quite there yet. It’s not that I don’t subscribe to the Die With Zero, Remit, “new” Choose Fi, “new” Mr. Money Mustache etc. type sentiment that has taken over the space. I get it. They’re rich now. They made the right choices. Invested during the right time. They made–or make–income talking and writing about FIRE. I tip my hat to them. I just can’t identify with their mentality, not yet at least. Not till I’ve done it.
I feel like this new spend it all now fad is somehow undermining a key tenet of FIRE. Namely discipline.
I’ve written a bit about my internal struggle of spending “now” vs “tomorrow”. And of course, I favor a healthy balance. But I want to retire early, and I’m not going to be able to retire early if I don’t sacrifice a few things today for a better tomorrow. To make things more complicated, I don’t hate work like I have in years past. My commute is not too bad. I’m the boss at work, finally. The family is as happy as ever. I’m the only one seemingly wanting more than what I have. Which in a way feels selfish. It just highlights the downsides to this travel curse that has taken hold of my soul.
In all likelihood I’ll continue on with my sailing in 2024. Maybe even 2025 and beyond. There’s a strong possibility I buy a sailboat and set off through the golden gate and take a left south when it comes to my FIRE date. I’ll only be able to do that if I hold fast to my plan. Which for me, means getting back and staying with a 50% savings rate. Right now my FIRE strategy has been reefed, as I weather out the strong winds of my upcoming vacation and taxes. I do see the wind dying down up ahead, and the need for a reef in my FIRE plans looks unnecessary. It’s time to pull up the main sheet, put my head down and make my course for my next destination; wherever that is.
Discover more from Happily Disengaged
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
Add a Comment
This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.
FI Fads indeed!
I went hardcore deprivation FI for years-ate rice and beans, didn’t own a car, lived in a moderately scary neighborhood, etc.
The first year of early retirement took some adjustment-it was a bit weird.
But now that I’ve gotten used to this new life, I’ve got to say, all the savings was totally worth it.
Glad you’re not falling for the hype of this new FI trend. Figuring out what is right for you instead of following the herd seems like the way to go. Good luck to you in finding your balance.
I do miss sailing; I grew up near lake michigan and learned there. I loved small catamarans; nothing like flying a hull. I get what you’re saying about the ancient tradition connection. There’s that transcendent feeling there, like getting ready for a raid, or hunting. Rooting you through generations that have been where we’ve been, to build, to provide, to explore, to defend…ultimately to push us to be a bit better, inch by inch.
Yeah the current “spend on luxury and learn how to spend” thing boggles my mind. Just shows how the ones with the biggest platforms and microphones might have grown a bit out of touch with those still in accumulation mode–happens to every community I guess. I can appreciate you doing it the hard way. There’s that old stoic saying: “the obstacle is the way”, which I subscribe to. The harder something is to do the greater the reward. The balance part seems to be the hardest part of this whole FI thing for me to date.
I hear the Great Lakes have some great sailing and scenery. When I was stationed out in Great Lakes I remember seeing all the sailboats and thinking how cool it would be to sail out and around Chicago. Great way of putting the essence of sailing into a few words. Every time I hear waves breaking, fire crackling, or wind rustling, I think about how ancient those sounds are, and how any human from any time could recognize those sounds. Sailing somehow fits into that quite nicely.
Thanks for reading and taking the time to comment!
There’s a lot that resonates here. I grew up sailing small boats in the Bay Area and around CA. It has been a long time but I still think and read about sailing a lot. My wife has never sailed but is very interested, so we’ll be getting a small cruiser at some point in the future. We also just got back from a summer in Europe, the first since Covid, and things have definitely got more expensive:(
None of this is very frugal, obviously, but neither will it change our financial trajectory in a meaningful way. I don’t believe I’ll ever buy a new tesla suv of fly business class, but those aren’t things I care about, and I am definitely in support of some kind of future/present balance. I think if you’re lucky enough to be in a comfortable position with work, income and savings, as you sound like you are, you can be frugal within the context of optimizing for present and future life, rather than for the shortest possible path to FI.
Our household makes a good bit more and spends a good bit less than most American households, and depending on what others see us doing it’s obvious that they usually perceive us as much richer or much poorer than we are. I hope this is a sign that we’re making good financial decisions for our particular goals and values.
Cool you’ve sailed around the Bay Area. I can see that sailing has deep hooks. A small little cruiser would be nice to get out on the water. I’m certainly considering the possibility of one day buying a boat of my own…though I’m a few years away from that decision.
Yeah we sure got lucky last time we went to Europe back in 2021. Things were still recovering and we kind of reaped the rewards of being the first to travel. We’re certainly going to be spending a pretty penny next month, but that’s fine by me. Agree that the fastest path is not always the best path. As long as I’m having fun along the way, I don’t mind a few more years working for the man in order to better enjoy today.Though a high savings rate is always on my mind.
I like the way you put that: “Our household makes a good bit more and spends a good bit less than most American households…” good stuff right there. Really that’s the essence of PF isn’t it? Make more than you spend. Follow that simple recipe and things should stay kind of under control, from a money standpoint at least.
Thanks for the comment!
I think the message that the figureheads are trying to promote is that there is more than one way to reach FI. In the extremely frugal method, some people get burned out living that way and think it would be more enjoyable to extend how long it takes to get there, in order to experience some travel while the kids are young. I can see both methods; people just have to figure out what makes them happiest. The other factor is sometimes life does not work out the way you plan. Your partner can get sick or someone has a bad accident and your plans have to change. If something gives you great joy, it would be a shame to give it up unless you can replace it with something of equal joy.
Great perspective and take. I understand where the new message is coming from; it comes from wisdom of having taken the hard road. Personally, I kind of fall into the middle of what you describe. There’s certainly value in different perspectives and having an open mind to listen to other ways of doing things. I agree there’s not one way to FIRE, and that’s what makes FI cool. I try to keep my mind open, it’s like that saying: “In the beginners mind there are many possibilities, in the experts mind there are few.” I just think that to attack frugality as some kind of flaw, like the new narrative kind of leans, might be a bit harsh.
Thanks for taking the time to read and comment. Always nice to see your take.
I took a “try sail” class a couple months ago in the Chesapeake and it was a lot of fun. While I’d love to pick it up as a habit, I feel I live a little farther away than I would prefer, requiring upwards of 90 minutes to get to the water. Reading your post makes me wonder if I should try to get a little closer and see how much I’d enjoy it after taking a sailing school course.
Wow Chesapeake Bay…that’s one of my dream sailing destinations. That’s quite a commute. Right now we drive 20 min one way to get to our club, which isn’t too bad, but after a day of sailing in the sun or winds, the drive feels extra long back home. That would be awesome if you could find a way get back out on the water more often.
Thanks for stopping by.
As someone who went the ultra frugal route and then has stepped it back, I can say with full confidence that the “new” trend of FI is simply a natural direction for the first round of FI bloggers to take. They have more money than they’ll ever need and they desperately need to learn how to spend some of it lest they die with all that hard work wasted. There are people out there that literally cannot spend the money. They want a new saw or kayak rack and are petrified to buy them despite having hundreds of thousands or millions more than they’ll ever need.
So, my challenge for you is to step it back down and see what happens. Trust yourself to spend responsibly, indulge in sailing and other things that make you happy, and make memories with your family. Your daughter is only this age once and soon won’t want to be around you or will be too busy getting her own life established. You can always earn more later.
That’s right, it’s the first round of bloggers who’ve made it that are pushing this new agenda. And I do get it. I just can’t identify with it at this stage in my FIRE journey. Pretty fascinating to see the mental shift though I must admit. To live a certain way for so long and then have to shift habits around, especially something as critical as money habits, looks challenging.
I like the challenge. A healthy balance is always what I strive for and I agree my kids will only be this age once, missing out on their childhood for money would be a regret I’d never get over. Our savings rate has dipped in the last two years, and it’s not just due to inflation. I’m already starting to see that my goal of retirement in 2025 might not be possible at the rate I’m at right now, which is okay. I think setting a hard date to FIRE is problematic and stressful, even if projections are conservative. There are too many factors out of my control for that. My mentality is to take the day by day approach…journey over destination. I still do plan on getting my savings rate right in 2024, but cutting out sailing doesn’t feel right.
Thanks for reading and commenting.