The Create to Consume Ratio
My kids have this bad habit of complaining about being bored or calling something they don’t like boring. My girls probably overuse the word a bit, but it emphasizes their dislike for idle time. They are so used to having things at their fingertips, that any wait time instantly becomes intolerable dead time to them. They don’t know what it’s like to have to wait for their favorite song to come on the radio, or movie to play, or tv show to air. I can’t blame them, that’s the age we live in. It’s a fast time. Fast for me anyway. I think every generation is probably convinced life can’t get any faster, and that somehow humanity is hurdling further and further away from the happy satisfaction of overcoming struggle.
I have to admit, I get annoyed too when it comes to waiting. I don’t call it boring, but it’s not pleasant to wait for something I’m not accustomed to waiting for. Be it a cell signal, commercials to finish, traffic to die down…even waiting for my wife to “get ready” so we can go out. All this can drive my Type A personality up the wall.
So what do I usually fill this idle, boring, in between time with?
Well, pulling out the phone is an easy go to.
How did we wait for things before smartphones? I used to do it, but it feels so long ago that I’ve forgotten how to truly wait. In other words, forced consumption is what I fill this idle time with. If I consume, I feel like I’m accomplishing something. But am I really? Is reading the news about what’s happening in, say, China or congress, really helping my “wait” become more enjoyable?
When I’m sitting in Bay Area commuter traffic I either turn on the news or a podcast so I can feel like I’m doing something else other than simply sitting down waiting to get home. This is not a new thing either. There are old photos of commuters all lined up in trains with their noses in newspapers, ignorant to the happenings of the moment around them.
The Ratio
I think that our waking life can be divided up into two major camps.
We are either Creating or Consuming.
In between these two camps are where we are probably most unhappy, enduring insufferable bouts of idleness–or as my daughters say–boredom. The doldrums between creating and consuming is a mental no-mans land where only the most mindful of us can happily live.
Here’s a few rapid examples of what I mean by Creating and Consuming: We cook or eat. Read or write. Talk or listen. Grow or harvest. Make music or listen to it. Create wealth or spend wealth.
create
I’d like to believe that most humans are happier when they’re creating something. Sure, some people may be more “creative” or “artistic” than others, but all people have a need to create on some level. It’s a basic human need. We have to feel like we have done something. Anything. I know I feel happier after creating something. Especially if I’ve done it with my hands and it made my muscles ache, made me think hard, argue a point, maybe even gave me a bruise or two from the endeavor.
The same feeling comes from writing, sex, playing music, or a sport. There might be less thinking involved and more flowing and release, but its satisfaction none the less. Maybe the best kind, since it’s artistic satisfaction.
consume
A lot of people talk shit about consuming, mostly because it’s stereotyped as vegging out on social media consumption, Netflix binge-watching, or carelessly blowing cash away. Yes, too much consuming can be bad. Over consumption ruins lives. It keeps people in poverty, addicted, or working longer than they ever should. Consumption is like any drug. It feels good in the moment. Maybe too good. Too much will kill you or keep you in a prison if you aren’t careful.
If consuming is done right, it’s like medicine for the mind. A glass of cool water on a hot day. We need consumption to relax our minds…but in good measure of course.
What’s the point of creating if you aren’t going to consume some part of it, or even better, share it so someone else will consume what you’ve created? And doesn’t consuming something fantastic also inspire us to further create? It’s a fantastic cycle. A happy life has a great create consume balance. Our Ouroboros.
Two Choices
This past Saturday my oldest daughter came into our office when she woke up. She told me good morning and we did our pleasant weekend ritual where I ask her how she slept. How she feels. What she wanted to do today. You know, things I don’t ask during the week because I’m up and out before 5am.
She asked what I was doing and I told her I was writing. I could tell something was bothering her after a few minutes. I asked what was wrong?
“I’m bored.” She told me.
The words grated against my mind like nails on a blackboard. At first, I was irritated by what she said. Mainly, because as I said before, she always tells me this. She has a ton of toys in her room. She has books. She has the opportunity to watch television. Then I thought to myself, why am I feeling irritated?
I felt irritated because I was now waiting. Painfully idle. Waiting for her to run off and play so I could finish what I was in the middle of doing before she came to tell me she was bored.
“There’s two things you can do to get rid of your boredom.” I told her. “You can create something or you can consume something. Right now I’m creating something. Do you want to create something with me?”
I then explained what consuming was because she asked me what it meant. Then she decided that she wanted to create something. Great choice, I thought to myself. We pulled out some blank printing paper and a few pens and crayons and I helped her make a little book.
For me, I’m happiest when the ratio is a minimum of 60/40, Create to Consume ratio. Creating has to be a majority of my existence for me to feel satisfied and content. I’d like to believe that it’s that way for most people too.
Do I track this ratio? No. I just know that when I have free time, I like to create in the morning and consume in the afternoons. That works for my character. I sort of just wing it…which might be to my detriment.
These days, I probably consume more than I should. Especially on weeknights. After getting home from work, which is later now that I’m in the city again and staying till 4pm, I can barely read without falling asleep. So I resort to watching something on tv to unwind.
On the weekend it’s a double-edged sword for me. The urge to do. To create is intense. I want to both read, write, do yard work, and hang out with the kids all at the same time. Which can make anything I do feel anxiety-ridden because I’m thinking of what I could or should be doing instead. A lot of this feeling has to do with only having so much free time and too much ambition. At work, I constantly think about how I’ll spend my free time on the weekend. And when the weekend comes, if things don’t go per plan it can be frustrating.
I’ve waited all week for a quiet Saturday morning so I can do XYZ. Is a mindset that can lead to trouble. My days off, I’m constantly watching the clock, watching my weekend slip by one hour at a time. If it’s noon and I haven’t done much, or I get thrown a wild card, I feel defeated. It’ll be another week till I get another go…
But that’s life. I can only do one thing at a time. Stopping and realizing this is the part I’m constantly refining. Breathe and relax. Keep the phone in your pocket or on the nightstand. These can be the best thoughts of the day for me.
will financial independence make things better?
Fuck yeah.
Okay, I’m not naïve enough to think that reaching FIRE will somehow fix this anxiety I feel about squeezing in enough time to create or eliminate the pain of idleness or the suffering of over consumption.
But I do hope that if I can master my time now–the ratio–when I do retire early, I will have a better go at dealing with an abundance of time. Which I can imagine drives some people crazy.
I might even learn to enjoy waiting for things and being bored if I have more time. That’s what I’m truly after if I’m honest. I’m after control of my time and the discipline to deal with doing absolutely nothing.
So what’s your ratio? How often do you Consume vs Create? Are you good at waiting without jumping on your phone or looking for something to read or listen to?
Are you a master of your time?
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Hey Noel! I think the struggle between creating vs consuming is a real one that a lot of us face day-to-day…but perhaps most importantly, we face it in small ways while we’re still working. To your point, for many of us, it’s just a handful of hours per day that are “free”. That’s when we have to struggle between the two poles of consumption and creation.
While most people do “create” during the day for work, it’s very different to do so under your own direction and without the incentive to pay your bills.
The problem with retirement is that, with all that free time, how will you balance your creation/consumption ratio without much incentive to do either in particular? I think that stresses a lot of folks out. And you alluded to this in your closing.
Getting it right before you have an onslaught of free time will prevent what many retirees seem to (somehow!) run into: boredom. It’s seemingly becoming a destructive phase of life after work for many (as evidenced by death rates for people once they retire at elderly ages).
I think one of the best ways to fight this is to become more of a generalist as we get closer to retirement age (whether early or traditional). Just like with your investments, you should diversify them to spread the risk out more and more as you get closer to retirement. Why not do the same with your interests in order to prevent the mental bankruptcy that comes from losing it all…boredom.
Thanks for a fun posts, as always, Noel!
Well said comment Chris. I think you have a wonderful perspective being an early retiree. Without direction or money as the goal, I can imagine its very hard to “create” in ways that bring satisfaction. Or get down on yourself for not accomplishing certain goals. The stress of finding that balance as you mention is a potential red flag for someone like myself with a Type-A personality. I can certainly see how early retirement could potentially amplify any imbalance of the create to consume ratio.
I like that idea about diversification of interests prior to retirement and the use of the line: “mental bankruptcy”. That’s very sharp to point out the similarities between mental wealth and monetary wealth. Why not diversify interests like we would with our investments?! That may be the key right there and a very astute observation.
Great comment Chris. Made me think deeper about time management and strategies to implement now rather than later. Thanks for stopping by.
This one is definitely for the thinking man to ponder and a lot to unpack here. I really enjoyed reading it.
I think one of the constant battles in life is how to slow down. As you summarize, this world is too fast paced with constant distractions. Our minds aren’t built this way naturally, so it’s up to us to create the right balance.
I like your creation/consumption take. I think I tend to think of consumption just as a different shade of creation. Really that’s all life is when we break it down: moments, experiences and happenings with every single breath; none ever identical. Cooking is form of creation as well as eating new foods is creating a unique experience. We can create by writing but reading also creates new ideas and inspirations. I kind of look at it as a two sided mirror.
You also hit a good point that consumption is mostly looked upon as negative. But again, our entire life is based on consumption. We have to eat, we need shelter, we need clothes. There are so many basic needs that we take for granted and don’t normally associate as consumption that are beneficial and necessary.
Lastly, funny aside on the phone and waiting. A few years ago I challenged myself to try and not look at my phone while waiting. It was very difficult and awkward. When waiting in a business meeting and everyone’s on their phone and you’re just looking around trying not to pull it out, I looked like a moron. Or when in a doctor’s waiting room, or waiting for an elevator and you are the only one not on a phone, people start looking up at you like you’re some weirdo. It was pretty entertaining at times. Try it out and see what happens.
Hey Q-FI, yeah slowing down is super hard to do. I feel like some people can do this naturally and I envy their ability to slow down and take it easy. Maybe those people struggle internally, but they don’t show it. Meanwhile I’m on the other side of the spectrum and have this sense of guilt if I’m not constantly “doing” something.
Great way to look at consumption as creation. We can create all sorts of experiences while consuming. That two sided mirror approach makes sense and appeals to me. Everything is connected and not one thing is distinct from the other. I believe consuming feeds creation and vice verse as well.
That’s so funny. I’ve tried to do that too, the no phone wait, and yeah, people do look at you like a weirdo if you just sit and look around haha. I noticed when I mindfully don’t get on my phone for idle time, I notice how many people just zone out everywhere I look. A phone is in a hand or sitting nearby. I’m guilty of being a phone zombie too, but its one of those things that once you notice it, you can’t un-notice it.
I enjoyed this one quite a bit. I’ve not previously thought in binary terms of creating v. consumption – it’s an interesting notion and like Q-FI states above it can get a tad murky. For example, I’m reading and thinking about your article here and now actively creating a response. That likely falls into both categories.
Anyway, I have difficulty being mentally and physically idle, so I don’t usually fall into “veg consumption,” but I read 3+ hours a day, so there’s a lot of consumption. Anyway, I’m going to pay greater attention to this for a week or so as you’ve provoked my curiosity. What I can tell you is that going on my 3rd year of retirement, I’m still struggling to “slow down” after decades of a hectic existence. I’m getting slightly better, but it sure is a tough habit to break.
Thanks for stopping by Mr Fate. Yeah it can be a bit murky. One thing feeds another and so on, as you intelligently state. I see the ratio as being a tool for being aware of what we are doing in the moment. I was thinking about your Total Black Out Project as I wrote about phone usage and veg consumption. I think you’re onto something by bringing attention to screen time consumption and usage. I’m still envious of your reading time. That sounds like a dream for me. The slowdown part I can imagine is a huge change. It must be wonderful though, to know you don’t have work tomorrow, or the next day, or the next…Already I’m feeling the “Sunday Blues” knowing I’ll be back at it mañana.
Thanks for reading and commenting. Always appreciated…
ha, this is another instance where i’m happy to not own a phone! i swear, noel, that i feel retired right now as i have the opposite problem of too much free time…and i still work 40 hours. i might have over-streamlined my life and that is compounded by being picky about how i spend my free time.
with not much on the plate or the schedule that are absolute “must do’s” i tend towards doing even less. sure, i could list a couple of ebay items every saturday with good results. sometimes i just don’t feel like it so i don’t. i do enjoy creating like this blog and cooking especially. man, it’s all a work in progress, but life is really just a work in progress, isn’t it? we’ll all find the balance and contentment to some degree. that guilt you describe is surely real.
this was a really good post.
I can’t even imagine the freedom you must have not owning a phone. I’m sure there must be a few inconveniences, but just not being on a tether must be liberating. I think when I FIRE I might do a stint with no phone.
I call that a good life. You have free time and get the pay check. I hope to one day feel like I have enough time so that it doesn’t stress me out. Life is just a work in progress. That’s the fun of it. If we think we’ll “get there” someday, or “one day” then it will probably be too late haha.
Thanks for commenting Freddy
Other than the conversation with your daughter, this post about your weekend mindset was like a script from my mind. I’m always focused on what I should do, even if I’m doing something I should or want to do, and I find I race through everything to beat that clock. It’s a never ending cycle, so I hope it ceases or at least eases once I retire and have fewer demands on my time.
For the record, I prefer creating, but I love consuming too (chocolate especially!).
That weekend mindset can be such a killer, even though it comes from a good well intentioned place. I also hope that less demand equals greater peace in the future. I’m just so wired to plan and do, I figure I need to start recognizing my time problem now, rather than wait for the FI pot of gold at the end of the rainbow.
Thanks for stopping by and commenting! Chocolate consumption is a must…
Well, just consumed another great piece here. See that? 😆
Lately I’m definitely creating much more than consuming. I’m finding it harder to squeeze in much consumption time due to my busy schedule and long days but I make it a point to do so. All work and no play = dull. But I know it’s only for a season so I keep going.
Can’t say that I am a master of my time but I am much better at that than other things. What I need to master is my mind. I so relate to you on the anxiety of doing one thing but stressing over what you are unable to do because well, you are only one person. The entire time I am doing said task, wondering in my head should I be doing that other thing instead?
Type A’s unite!
Smart call on the mastering the mind part. That really is the trick, isn’t it? It’s our thoughts about our actions that really matter, not how much time we spend doing A or B. I’m glad I’m not the only one who is thinking about the next step while not completing the current one. I think that mindset is great for work environments, but not so good for home and family life. One thing I (or any type A’s) may have to accept is that I will never slow down, it’s our high strung type A nature. So mastering the mind, like you say, is the key. Also being aware of what we are doing in the moment. That’s why I like to just stop and think: is this creation or consumption? Just helps me put things in perspective.
Thanks for reading and commenting!